I made the BIGGEST mistake last night and watched Hopkins - if you haven't heard of it it's a true-life show where they follow doctors and patients around Johns Hopkins hospital and watch what unfolds. I used to love shows like Trauma, Life in the ER and such, and especially the baby shows like Special Delivery. The more serious the situation the better. I haven't been able to watch one of those since Coral was born. I've seen some preemie situations on the fictional shows like House and stuff but nothing where you know you're looking at a real baby and real family.
Wouldn't you know on Hopkins last night there was a 30-week preemie just like Coral and the baby died :cry: He had lung issues and they knew in advance that he probably wouldn't make it but it was SO sad. The parents were all prepared for his birth and very matter-of-fact about how he probably wouldn't survive, but then he was born and the mom was saying, "I hear him cry!" and "Thank you Jesus!" and "My baby!" over and over again. They took the baby to the NICU and tried to save him but his lungs were too badly damaged and in just a short time they had to give up. I was bawling watching it.
I stayed up past midnight because I couldn't stop thinking about it. That sort of stuff just takes you right back. I can't imagine how I EVER liked watching that stuff. I'm crying now just thinking about it. I didn't let go of Coral for a long time last night - there's not a moment where I'm not grateful that she's here and healthy.